The two space explorers had traveled light years in search of life on another planet.  Their counterparts back home had ridiculed them for even suggesting the possibility, but they were determined to search the furthest galaxies and perhaps prove the naysayers wrong.

They had stopped to inspect several planets over the eight years of their mission, but none showed signs of life.  Now, their spaceship was starting to show signs of wear, and an alarming number of sensors and instruments were no longer working.  "We're flying blind," Commander Statler said to Lieutenant Waldorf.  While Statler was officially in charge of the mission, he and Waldorf worked closely as a team and treated each other as equals.  Waldorf knew that his partner was right.  They would have to turn around and go back home because, even taking a direct path, they had a three year-long return trip.  With each additional sensor that failed, the ship was less likely to be capable of making the return journey.

Waldorf said, "I detect another Class 3 planet up ahead.  Let's investigate this one final planet, and then we'll turn around."  Statler agreed, and within two hours they were orbiting the multicolored sphere.  Unfortunately, because their advanced scanning equipment was no longer functioning, the only way to inspect the planet was to land on it.

Touchdown was soft and uneventful just as all of Statler's landings were.  He was an experienced pilot, and Waldorf felt safe with his Commander at the controls.  They quickly suited up just as they had done so many times before, and stepped out into the unknown.

Immediately they knew this was unlike the other planets they had explored.  There was life!  Wasn't it?  In front, and all around them were thin green lifeforms that seemed to be welcoming them in unison.  They were extremely tall, and Waldorf estimated that they were at least six times their own height.  None of these beings stood out from the others.  They spoke in unison in a low murmur that was completely unintelligible to the two explorers.  "What do you call yourselves?" Waldorf asked looking up at those closest to him.  He got no response.  "What do you call this place?" Statler asked as he gestured with his hands all around them.  Again, no response.

Both of them had recording devices embedded in their suits that would document everything they saw and heard.  This would be their only proof to those back home that they had found life.  While they had hoped to find intelligent life, the beings before them certainly didn't appear to be so. 

Statler began to ask another question when he was suddenly interrupted.  All of the green beings began speaking louder and swaying back and forth in violent motions.  Statler asked, "What are they doing?" 

Waldorf replied, "I don't know, but I think we've made them angry."  The green beings started speaking even louder, now a dull roar and the beings behind them leaned over and brushed the back of the two explorers.  Waldorf jumped at the unexpected sensation and yelled, "Let's get out of here!"

Statler had already taken the first step back to the ship, and Waldorf was right on his heels.  They quickly raced inside and closed the door behind them.  Statler pressed the emergency takeoff button and in seconds they had blasted away and left the atmosphere of the strange planet.  Statler set a course back home, and it was nearly an hour before they had relaxed enough to start talking about their ordeal.

"At least they didn't have any weapons," Waldorf commented. 

Statler said, "How do you know they didn't?  We got out of there so fast, maybe they just didn't have time to use them."  They both knew they had had a close call, but it was worth it.  They had their evidence that there was life on another planet.  Now, they just had to make it back home.

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EPILOGUE

Statler and Waldorf did make it back home, and they did present their evidence to an awestruck crowd on their own planet.  Except their home planet was not Earth.  They were from the planet Tasmuaras.  Earth was the strange planet they visited.  They landed in the small town of Hardin, Kentucky, in the front yard of Dave Palmer, a disc jockey at a local radio station.  Even though Mr. Palmer was home, he had no idea he had visitors.  Why?  Because his visitors were only a half inch tall, and they had landed in his freshly mowed green lawn.  Perhaps if the visitors had stayed longer, the two parties would have met, but a gust of wind blew through the grass and scared them off.  Mr. Palmer missed his only opportunity to meet the inhabitants of Tasmuaras.